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djmcnary
12-30-2004, 06:53 PM
My wife divorced me on 11/23. I use this phrase because I am still very much in love with her. Unfortunantly, she no longer feels the same way about me. We would have been married 6 years on 12/19, and miss her very, very much.

I know that I have not posted much, and that I do not join in on conversations offen. However, I am on the website everyday, reading, laughing, learning, and escaping for a bit. I can not overstate how much this means to me. The site gives me a place to go and pick my spirits up.

So to all of those out there who were helping me and didn't even know it....Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Someday I hope to meet several of you in person, but I feel as if I know something about you already.

Until then, I remain gratefull,

Douglas

Logan
12-30-2004, 07:00 PM
Chin Up Doug! It's all good in the bigger scheme of things.

merc406
12-30-2004, 07:00 PM
Sorry to hear that Doug, you will be alright. :grouphug:

What was it the toilet seat or the toilet paper position?

jstevens
12-30-2004, 07:02 PM
Dear Doug,

Please try to think that there are other things in store for you, some good and maybe some not as good.

I hear what your saying as I fall more in love with my wife every day.
Glad to hear that you lurk in the background as I don't post as often either.

I know this may not be of help but I wanted to try to offer some words of encouragement the best that I could.

John

Bradley G
12-30-2004, 07:20 PM
Doug,

The one way relationship is very painful.If her feelings have changed,you must figure out how to be happy with out her.Early on, you may have to rely to people close to you for encouragement/help from the despair.But remember time will heal your heart.If you were able to meet some new people as well this will keep you moving toward future interests.I love this site too !Many here have helped me and made me Laugh.Even sometimes choaked me up a bit too!For this I am greatful.And not to make light of your situation But when I read a story Like yours here .I can not help feeling greatful to you for reminding me how luckey I am.Thank you from me and get out and get that fire again!
Bradley G

Smokie
12-30-2004, 07:27 PM
Sorry about your marriage, glad you found some comfort in following our daily soap opera, I hope you have one good friend to lean on....but you don't have to be alone, great bunch of guys in the Chicago area....a little driving can be good for the soul. Hold your head up and continue to live.

dwasson
12-30-2004, 07:49 PM
Doug, living well is the best revenge. Go on, live your life, be happy, and get a supercharger for the Marauder.

Patrick
12-30-2004, 07:56 PM
However, I am on the website everyday, reading, laughing, learning, and escaping for a bit. I can not overstate how much this means to me. The site gives me a place to go and pick my spirits up.



Sorry to hear this. But your right about the web site, It helps me in my struggles too. I can only offer prayers!

jgc61sr2002
12-30-2004, 08:06 PM
Doug - Sorry to hear that. :( Remember were are here to support you. Anytime you are down think of us because we are thinking of you. God bless.

Jessica
12-30-2004, 08:13 PM
Douglas,

In time you'll view this as a learning experience, for now keep your chin up. It'll be a New Year soon, hope your able to make it a great one.

Jessica

djmcnary
12-30-2004, 08:39 PM
Doug, living well is the best revenge. Go on, live your life, be happy, and get a supercharger for the Marauder.One good thing ?!?! is that in the sale of our house, I made a significant chunk of change. I have already started some cosmetic mods (tint, spoiler, spash guards, trunk organizer etc) I have been seriously thinking about a trip to DR's for some new rear gears, pulleys, stat and plugs...but I dunno yet.

I have thought seriously about the supercharger, but I have a 100K warranty that I don't want to void.....yet:)

Thanks for all of your responses. Currently the closest family I have is in Chattanooga, TN (sister), so I kinda feel like I belong to this family...I'm just the cousin that no one hears from !

Thanks,

Douglas

Patrick
12-30-2004, 08:42 PM
One good thing ?!?! is that in the sale of our house, I made a significant chunk of change. I have already started some cosmetic mods (tint, spoiler, spash guards, trunk organizer etc) I have been seriously thinking about a trip to DR's for some new rear gears, pulleys, stat and plugs...but I dunno yet.

I have thought seriously about the supercharger, but I have a 100K warranty that I don't want to void.....yet:)

Thanks for all of your responses. Currently the closest family I have is in Chattanooga, TN (sister), so I kinda feel like I belong to this family...I'm just the cousin that no one hears from !

Thanks,

Douglas

I am 20 miles north of Chattanooga. Give me a PM anytime!

2003 MIB
12-30-2004, 08:55 PM
This might be a little too personal but I feel obligated to share my story:
I married the first time at 19 to a 29 year-old woman with 4 kids. It was a disaster and I bounced back pretty easy after the divorce telling myself that it was a mistake, learning experience etc... It still sucked to end it and I felt like a failure.
The second time I married the most evil woman on the planet (I know that's just my opinion and there are two sides to every story- feel free to make a pentagram in graveyard soil and chant "Kim" three times- she'll appear in a ball of fire and will tell you her side). Even though she was mean and leaving was smart the divorce put me in a depression and long dance with Xanex and Jack Daniels. Talk about failure- twice divorced before 30 and pretty numb to the whole relationship concept. I mean the common factor in two failed marriages was me- I wasn't meant to be a husband.
I started on an eight year bachelor party that was the stuff Motley Crue wrote songs about. Life of the party and fronting the image of happy single living. It was all B/S.
Then along came Coli- an oasis in a desert of meaningless serial dating. Met her in June- proposed in January- Married in June. I live in a madhouse with two teenaged stepdaughters and a very "energetic" 4 year-old stepson. There are days when the only quiet place in my world is in the driveway under one of the cars. It's paradise, Douglas- absolute paradise and I thank god every night for bringing this woman into my life. I watch a lot more Spongebob and a lot less porn. I go to soccer games I don't understand and have a recurring role as the "Green Goglin" in the boy's neverending Spiderman game. I've never been happier.
Jessica is right- learn from it and the right woman is out there. Don't get in a hurry to find her and she'll fall right into your lap. It worked for me and it'll work for you too. Failure is an event not a person. Chin up on move on.
Oh I almost forgot- she's a babe- check out the gallery pics.

MyTMerc
12-30-2004, 09:08 PM
I feel your pain Douglas. I'm going through the same thing after 25 excellent years. It's not right, it's not fair, it just is. Do your best to accept it and take comfort in the fact that your not alone. Your right, this site is great therapy. For a car guy, theres no better therapy (well almost) than talking about your car. OK well maybe there's plenty of other constrructive things to do, but keep peddling, you'll get to the top of the hill soon enough and then it's gets easier.

CRUZTAKER
12-30-2004, 09:30 PM
Hang in there man....there is someone out there looking for you...learn from this experience and become stronger.;)

67435animal
12-31-2004, 03:07 AM
My wife divorced me on 11/23. I use this phrase because I am still very much in love with her. Unfortunantly, she no longer feels the same way about me. We would have been married 6 years on 12/19, and miss her very, very much.

I know that I have not posted much, and that I do not join in on conversations offen. However, I am on the website everyday, reading, laughing, learning, and escaping for a bit. I can not overstate how much this means to me. The site gives me a place to go and pick my spirits up.

So to all of those out there who were helping me and didn't even know it....Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Someday I hope to meet several of you in person, but I feel as if I know something about you already.

Until then, I remain gratefull,

Douglas

I've been there, Doug. Sorry your wife left you but, you are now better off without someone who does not care for you. It takes time, but, you will find a better mate. I did!

Bob

jdando
12-31-2004, 07:23 AM
Douglas;

Ouch. It is difficult to find words that may ease some of your pain. From experience, the place you are in is only temporary. This to shall pass. Hang in there, make good choices, use the resources you have (family, friends, this board, counselors).

If you need to, break the month, week, day into manageable chunks. Sometimes we live minute to minute.

jeremy

Bluerauder
12-31-2004, 07:39 AM
Ouch. It is difficult to find words that may ease some of your pain.
Doug, what he ^^^^ said. Good luck and best wishes in getting past this difficult time. Chime in periodically. You have friends here !! :)

FiveO
12-31-2004, 07:47 AM
Doug,

Yesterday was the 1st anniversary of my divorce. When I divorced my wife due to her infidelity (only married 11 months)...I was still very much in love with her and for Jan-March my life was hell. I cried almost every night. But...things got better. I divorced my ex because I knew I couldn't continue living a life where I always wondered who my wife was having sex with.

Life is great now. I too love this site. I come here every day to relax and take in some drama :)

Keep your chin up...I know my situation isn't exactly the same but I went through some of the same feelings. I still loved her...much earlier this year. I have moved on. I had to.

Life is what you make of it. Take care of yourself first and foremost and everything else will work out positively.

Best of luck. Ever need a shoulder to lean on...just PM me.

Mark...

Vortex
12-31-2004, 08:55 AM
There are plenty of haggamiers looking for guys on yahoo and other sites. Enjoy your freedom. Put your feet on the coffee table.

Sactown
12-31-2004, 09:08 AM
Doug,

I've never been through your situation and I won't pretend to know what it is like. I'm just very glad that this place is a nice refuge for you, it works the same way for me for different reasons. Keep coming back each day, we're here for you.

Blue03
12-31-2004, 10:14 AM
I have been seriously thinking about a trip to DR's for some new rear gears, pulleys, stat and plugs...but I dunno yet.
Douglas

Everyone's situation is different, but my 1st wanted out too. Took a while for me to get it and then accept it. She felt trapped and hanging on longer would have just made things worse and uglier. Sometimes you just have to let go.

You may be onto something with your trip to DR's. The summer of my split I took a solo road trip in my 74 V6 Capri from Chicago around Lake Michigan and Lake Superior. I camped the whole way, took a couple of weeks, saw some nice places and enjoyed some great Canadian hospitality. I still remember time on Mackinac Island, a tourista Ameythyst mine, Thunder Bay, Isle Royale, Michigan Upper Peninsula, Door County and some fun roads. Now if I could have put a supercharger on the Capri back then or better yet had a S/C'd MM...can you imagine...

At any rate as you see with other posts you're not alone, it takes time and the best is yet to come... I like Dianna Kralls song that goes something like you just have to ... Pick yourself up, Dusk yourself off and Start all over again... Hang in there and all the best in 2005!!!

teamrope
12-31-2004, 10:30 AM
I am glad to hear this site helps. It has helped me in a lot of ways, and I've made a lot of freinds here.

I have also enjoyed a lot of the humor that comes from this site. I don't know if you have seen this one yet, but it was one of the funniest threads I rember. It had me ROFLMAO.

http://www.mercurymarauder.net/forums/showthread.php?t=6719 (http://www.mercurymarauder.net/forums/showthread.php?t=6719&highlight=accounting+taste)

rayjay
12-31-2004, 10:33 AM
Doug, hang in there, it gets better. There is a 4 letter word, TIME, I hated that word the last time I got divorced. My ex kept stringing me along. Finally after 18 months I got mad about the whole thing and let it go. I met the woman of my dreams and we have been together for 16 years now. I have a lovely 7yr old daughter. My grown children and I are closer than ever. All this took TIME, that dreaded word. It WILL get better if you don't mess with it. Let her go and move on to a better life.

ncmm
12-31-2004, 10:42 AM
Doug,

It's a New Year, new experiences will come your way and you'll find your way and maybe even find that special someone. I've been hunting for 30+ years and have come close but haven't found the right one. You can love them but if they don't love you it's not worth it. Enjoy 2005 and many more years to come.

Bigdogjim
12-31-2004, 04:24 PM
Douglas: Hey just read your post! What timeing? I am on my way to Wedding reception. I have been married 13 1/2 years. Wife (Garfield) hates the car but otherwise a grat girl!
Hang in man it only gets better.
Will always be here if you need us! Promise! You can take that to the bank, Big Dog said so!

Happy New Year my friend:)

RoyLPita
01-01-2005, 04:37 AM
Maybe it's the location, but when it comes to women, I'm the one who is nice & the other treats me like dirt. Plus, only the taken ones are the nice ones. And you can't trust either of them. At times like that, I don't mind being a loner. However, I still have hope for the finding right one, but it has to be mutual.

I envy those who have a loving & caring relationship that has been going on for years.

Start 2005 with a "clean slate". Put what has happened in the past behind you and call it experience. Also, hang in there, man, we are here for you.