View Full Version : My pledge to my fellow MM owners....
Shaft333
04-20-2005, 12:15 PM
Anti-rice Pledge
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As the owner of this 2003 Mercury Marauder, a car truly inspired by American cars of the generations of before I do pledge the following…
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I will not add any badges, stickers or insignia that represent a car model that does not exist or that my car is not. I will not call it a Marauder R, Si, Si-R, SQ4double-9 Z cubed, 5.0, RT nor Hemi, Quarter, Fifth, 40, 16oz or Big Gulp. Nor shall I put any sticker, logo, and insignia for any brand of part that I may have or not have installed in the fashion of race sponsors without actual race sponsorship for said brand. This includes popular products that often enhance motor sports such as K&N, Mobil 1, MotorCraft, Viagra and porn.
I will not have carbon fiber parts unless I truly need the technical benefits of said material. And with the most technical advantage being weight savings and strength – I decree that I shall endeavor to spare the second helping of any meal to save the weight in my belly before saving the weight on my gas cap cover.
I will not install any 747-edition spoiler, apparatus, movable or immovable unless I truly require the added benefit of down force.
I will not install clear tail lights, blue taillights (blue dots excluded), pink, zebra, lizard or flavored taillights for they are truly rice and not the modification of my American fore fathers.
I will not have high-speed turn signals unless I actually have a burnt out bulb. In which case I promise to repair said problem with a new bulb so that I will not have high-speed turn signals any more.
I will have two wiper blades on two separate wiper arms.
My headlights will be a white light for the purposes of illuminating my path. Any enhancement that I may make to the headlights will be for the enhancement of path illumination. Nor shall I have my fog lights turned on unless the conditions require it so.
I will not add any non-functional mockup of a functional part including hood scoops, antennae, side scoops, brake vents or holes in the head. If a modification were to be functional, it must truly serve a purpose and do more than blow more air toward something that once had not more air blown on it.
I will not have racing stripes on my car made of vinyl or otherwise. For my car does not benefit from the visual bisecting of its width. Nor will I have vinyl graphics applied to windows that state a brand, a foreign character, an invented symbol, or fire, fluid, gas or animal print. I will not put my name in vinyl graphics, nor a made up name, nor any image of Calvin, Hobbes, Fred Flintstone, Barney Rubble, Bon Jovi, Hillary Clinton or any other cartoon character.
I shall never be able to fit my head into my exhaust without severe modification to my head.
I will not modify my suspension without severe improvement to the handling of my car. I will never consider that bouncing while going in a straight line an improvement in handling.
I will not add racing seats to my car unless I do use the vehicle for racing in a form where I require racing seats. This includes the use of any racing harness as replacement for seatbelts. I will also not install racing safety modifications such as roll bars and sprinkler systems unless absolutely required by my local racing establishment and that I intend and do race at such establishment.
I will not add additional gages to my car unless I require the information displayed on such gages for the improvement, enhancement, and reliability of my car. No added gage shall be installed purely for the sake of decoration. The oil gage in the vehicle is not only original but also acts as a mechanical idiot light thus is excused.
I will not use “Honda Racing Tape.”
I will add no false modifications to my car such as devices that mimic turbo blow off valves. Nor will I make my car have triple exhaust or something else that’s blatantly dumb.
I will never have a tail pipe that lights, or lights in my windshield washer fluids sprayers or lights that serve no function, for at least they should even security, indication or film development.
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All this I do solemnly swear. So help me God.
rayjay
04-20-2005, 01:03 PM
Did you get a bad bowl of rice today? There actually is a legit Marauder R
Shaft333
04-20-2005, 01:06 PM
And mine isn't one of them.
rayjay
04-20-2005, 01:13 PM
And mine isn't one of them.
Ok, you do realize that the Marauder is The Anti Rice :bows: :bows: :bows: :bows: :bows:
ckadiddle
04-20-2005, 01:14 PM
[QUOTE=Shaft333]Anti-rice Pledge
Nor shall I have my fog lights turned on unless the conditions require it so.
/QUOTE]
Actually, I drive with fog and head lights on day and night, rain or shine. Helps my crappy vision at night, helps other people's crappy vision to see me during the day. Please don't tell anyone.
Rider90
04-20-2005, 01:24 PM
Reinhart has "R" badges for his customer's............... ..............
and I drive with my fog lights & parking lights on during the day and through sunset.
Bluerauder
04-20-2005, 01:53 PM
Nor shall I have my fog lights turned on unless the conditions require it so.
Yeah, me too ... but at 54 I might be able to get away under the "conditions require it" clause. :rofl:
Shaft333
04-20-2005, 01:59 PM
Reinhart has "R" badges for his customer's............... ..............
and I drive with my fog lights & parking lights on during the day and through sunset.
I can understand the purpose of driving with the fogs and PL's on during the day. Works like DRL. Nice.
I'm still not putting an R on my car. Even if it's from Reinhart. It's what the ricers do. I still get a chuckle when I see a Civic Si-R or an Accord Type-R.
I also hate seeing 2nd gen Trans Ams with Chevy 350's in them.
I pledge to do whatever I think looks good, performs good on my car.
I pledge to not speak unkindly to anyone who has decided to do something I'd never do on my car (and believe me...there are some ugly Marauders out there...in my opinion....some have probably said/felt the same about mine).
I pledge that I'll park mine next to just about anyone's here...and still like mine the best.
BillyGman
04-20-2005, 03:02 PM
Hey, now that's my kind of pledge. :up: The ones below I found to be the most rediculous and amusing....
I will not add any badges, stickers or insignia that represent ......Quarter, Fifth, 40, 16oz or Big Gulp.
pink, zebra, lizard or flavored taillights .
I shall never be able to fit my head into my exhaust without severe modification to my head. :rofl:
one other thing that I consider ricey which wasn't mentioned in that list is the big letters across the windshield on a street driven car that simply states what brand of car it is . Or did I miss that one in your list?.
TechHeavy
04-20-2005, 03:44 PM
I pledge to do whatever I think looks good, performs good on my car.
I pledge to not speak unkindly to anyone who has decided to do something I'd never do on my car (and believe me...there are some ugly Marauders out there...in my opinion....some have probably said/felt the same about mine).
I pledge that I'll park mine next to just about anyone's here...and still like mine the best.
^^^What Todd said^^^
Operate your car, because it's your dam* car. :)
nexstar7
04-20-2005, 03:49 PM
Anti-rice Pledge
<!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> <!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p>
As the owner of this 2003 Mercury Marauder, a car truly inspired by American cars of the generations of before I do pledge the following…
<!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> <!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p>
I will not add any badges, stickers or insignia that represent a car model that does not exist or that my car is not. I will not call it a Marauder R, Si, Si-R, SQ4double-9 Z cubed, 5.0, RT nor Hemi, Quarter, Fifth, 40, 16oz or Big Gulp. Nor shall I put any sticker, logo, and insignia for any brand of part that I may have or not have installed in the fashion of race sponsors without actual race sponsorship for said brand. This includes popular products that often enhance motor sports such as K&N, Mobil 1, MotorCraft, Viagra and porn.
I will not have carbon fiber parts unless I truly need the technical benefits of said material. And with the most technical advantage being weight savings and strength – I decree that I shall endeavor to spare the second helping of any meal to save the weight in my belly before saving the weight on my gas cap cover.
I will not install any 747-edition spoiler, apparatus, movable or immovable unless I truly require the added benefit of down force.
I will not install clear tail lights, blue taillights (blue dots excluded), pink, zebra, lizard or flavored taillights for they are truly rice and not the modification of my American fore fathers.
I will not have high-speed turn signals unless I actually have a burnt out bulb. In which case I promise to repair said problem with a new bulb so that I will not have high-speed turn signals any more.
I will have two wiper blades on two separate wiper arms.
My headlights will be a white light for the purposes of illuminating my path. Any enhancement that I may make to the headlights will be for the enhancement of path illumination. Nor shall I have my fog lights turned on unless the conditions require it so.
I will not add any non-functional mockup of a functional part including hood scoops, antennae, side scoops, brake vents or holes in the head. If a modification were to be functional, it must truly serve a purpose and do more than blow more air toward something that once had not more air blown on it.
I will not have racing stripes on my car made of vinyl or otherwise. For my car does not benefit from the visual bisecting of its width. Nor will I have vinyl graphics applied to windows that state a brand, a foreign character, an invented symbol, or fire, fluid, gas or animal print. I will not put my name in vinyl graphics, nor a made up name, nor any image of Calvin, Hobbes, Fred Flintstone, Barney Rubble, Bon Jovi, Hillary Clinton or any other cartoon character.
I shall never be able to fit my head into my exhaust without severe modification to my head.
I will not modify my suspension without severe improvement to the handling of my car. I will never consider that bouncing while going in a straight line an improvement in handling.
I will not add racing seats to my car unless I do use the vehicle for racing in a form where I require racing seats. This includes the use of any racing harness as replacement for seatbelts. I will also not install racing safety modifications such as roll bars and sprinkler systems unless absolutely required by my local racing establishment and that I intend and do race at such establishment.
I will not add additional gages to my car unless I require the information displayed on such gages for the improvement, enhancement, and reliability of my car. No added gage shall be installed purely for the sake of decoration. The oil gage in the vehicle is not only original but also acts as a mechanical idiot light thus is excused.
I will not use “Honda Racing Tape.”
I will add no false modifications to my car such as devices that mimic turbo blow off valves. Nor will I make my car have triple exhaust or something else that’s blatantly dumb.
I will never have a tail pipe that lights, or lights in my windshield washer fluids sprayers or lights that serve no function, for at least they should even security, indication or film development.
<!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> <!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p>
All this I do solemnly swear. So help me God.
jesus, where you bored today
HwyCruiser
04-20-2005, 03:50 PM
Mmmmm... racing stripes
DEFYANT
04-20-2005, 03:50 PM
I pledge to do whatever I think looks good, performs good on my car.
I pledge to not speak unkindly to anyone who has decided to do something I'd never do on my car (and believe me...there are some ugly Marauders out there...in my opinion....some have probably said/felt the same about mine).
I pledge that I'll park mine next to just about anyone's here...and still like mine the best.
Says it all for me!
A lot of, I will not...........unless, in that manifesto.
I will not add hood art depicting Conan the Barbarian, the greatest Marauder of all time, unless done by A professional air brush artist.
I will challege all street performance cars unless there is the top half of a GMC 671 supercharger topped by two Holly double pumpers poking through a cut out in the hood.
teamrope
04-20-2005, 04:43 PM
I pledge that I'll park mine next to just about anyone's here...and still like mine the best.
:stupid: With the exeptions being most of the S/C ones. :)
I pledge to continue to tell people "23,000 dollars" every time they ask "How much them rims costs?"
rayjay
04-20-2005, 08:45 PM
I pledge to continue to tell people "23,000 dollars" every time they ask "How much them rims costs?"I took my front wheels into the only local tire store with a road force balancer. They asked where I bought them. When I stated they were OEM they didn't believe me. :bigcry: Best part is the owner had no clue what a Marauder was. I told him to call Ford and ask if there is such a car. :rolleyes: Guess they see too much rice-a-roni to recognize the real deal.
seans
04-21-2005, 05:38 AM
I love the exhaust line!:rock:
Joe Walsh
04-21-2005, 07:10 AM
A lot of, I will not...........unless, in that manifesto.
I will not add hood art depicting Conan the Barbarian, the greatest Marauder of all time, unless done by A professional air brush artist.
Hey, you forgot about Attila the Hun ...
When it came to Maraudin', he wrote the book!
Hey, you forgot about Attila the Hun ...
When it came to Maraudin', he wrote the book!
Your soooo right. That's who I was thinking of but "Conan" came out instead.
RR|Suki
12-04-2005, 01:39 AM
Anti-rice Pledge
<!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> <!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p>
As the owner of this 2003 Mercury Marauder, a car truly inspired by American cars of the generations of before I do pledge the following…
<!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> <!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p>
I will not add any badges, stickers or insignia that represent a car model that does not exist or that my car is not. I will not call it a Marauder R, Si, Si-R, SQ4double-9 Z cubed, 5.0, RT nor Hemi, Quarter, Fifth, 40, 16oz or Big Gulp. Nor shall I put any sticker, logo, and insignia for any brand of part that I may have or not have installed in the fashion of race sponsors without actual race sponsorship for said brand. This includes popular products that often enhance motor sports such as K&N, Mobil 1, MotorCraft, Viagra and porn.
I will not have carbon fiber parts unless I truly need the technical benefits of said material. And with the most technical advantage being weight savings and strength – I decree that I shall endeavor to spare the second helping of any meal to save the weight in my belly before saving the weight on my gas cap cover.
I will not install any 747-edition spoiler, apparatus, movable or immovable unless I truly require the added benefit of down force.
I will not install clear tail lights, blue taillights (blue dots excluded), pink, zebra, lizard or flavored taillights for they are truly rice and not the modification of my American fore fathers.
I will not have high-speed turn signals unless I actually have a burnt out bulb. In which case I promise to repair said problem with a new bulb so that I will not have high-speed turn signals any more.
I will have two wiper blades on two separate wiper arms.
My headlights will be a white light for the purposes of illuminating my path. Any enhancement that I may make to the headlights will be for the enhancement of path illumination. Nor shall I have my fog lights turned on unless the conditions require it so.
I will not add any non-functional mockup of a functional part including hood scoops, antennae, side scoops, brake vents or holes in the head. If a modification were to be functional, it must truly serve a purpose and do more than blow more air toward something that once had not more air blown on it.
I will not have racing stripes on my car made of vinyl or otherwise. For my car does not benefit from the visual bisecting of its width. Nor will I have vinyl graphics applied to windows that state a brand, a foreign character, an invented symbol, or fire, fluid, gas or animal print. I will not put my name in vinyl graphics, nor a made up name, nor any image of Calvin, Hobbes, Fred Flintstone, Barney Rubble, Bon Jovi, Hillary Clinton or any other cartoon character.
I shall never be able to fit my head into my exhaust without severe modification to my head.
I will not modify my suspension without severe improvement to the handling of my car. I will never consider that bouncing while going in a straight line an improvement in handling.
I will not add racing seats to my car unless I do use the vehicle for racing in a form where I require racing seats. This includes the use of any racing harness as replacement for seatbelts. I will also not install racing safety modifications such as roll bars and sprinkler systems unless absolutely required by my local racing establishment and that I intend and do race at such establishment.
I will not add additional gages to my car unless I require the information displayed on such gages for the improvement, enhancement, and reliability of my car. No added gage shall be installed purely for the sake of decoration. The oil gage in the vehicle is not only original but also acts as a mechanical idiot light thus is excused.
I will not use “Honda Racing Tape.”
I will add no false modifications to my car such as devices that mimic turbo blow off valves. Nor will I make my car have triple exhaust or something else that’s blatantly dumb.
I will never have a tail pipe that lights, or lights in my windshield washer fluids sprayers or lights that serve no function, for at least they should even security, indication or film development.<!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> <!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p>
All this I do solemnly swear. So help me God.
I can put on a 5.0 badge ;) :burnout:
wsmylie
12-04-2005, 10:40 AM
I took my front wheels into the only local tire store with a road force balancer. They asked where I bought them. When I stated they were OEM they didn't believe me. :bigcry: Best part is the owner had no clue what a Marauder was. I told him to call Ford and ask if there is such a car. :rolleyes: Guess they see too much rice-a-roni to recognize the real deal. Rayjay, problem not limited to ricers joints buddy....got the same BS from a Ford dealership service mgr no less, in a south Chicago burb while on a road trip in the MM awhile back. Went in for a warranty covered wheel alignment (fronts were starting to show the dreaded MM inside edge wear) and was initially told NO because the "aftermarket" wheels I had placed on the car had caused the tire wear problem. Pointed out FoMoCo part #s on MM wheels to the "Mr Know-it-all" ass't service mgr guy and he still argued claiming that even though they might be Ford numbered wheels that they were not a type of wheel originally/factory installed!! The smarter (and somewhat embarrassed) front-end guy finally had to show him the computer image of the wheel on the Ford parts data base to convince him. What made this exchange even more ridiculous was that they had a 03 300A sitting on their used car lot not 100 feet from where we were standing and it had the same "aftermarket" wheels on it too.:shake:
TripleTransAm
12-04-2005, 11:00 AM
I will not add hood art depicting Conan the Barbarian, the greatest Marauder of all time, unless done by A professional air brush artist.
Isn't he that guy with the late night talk show?
Anyway, if you must airbrush your hood, stick to flaming poultry or whatever may have a personal meaning to you.
Petrograde
12-04-2005, 11:13 AM
Rayjay, problem not limited to ricers joints buddy....got the same BS from a Ford dealership service mgr no less, in a south Chicago burb while on a road trip in the MM awhile back. Went in for a warranty covered wheel alignment (fronts were starting to show the dreaded MM inside edge wear) and was initially told NO because the "aftermarket" wheels I had placed on the car had caused the tire wear problem. Pointed out FoMoCo part #s on MM wheels to the "Mr Know-it-all" ass't service mgr guy and he still argued claiming that even though they might be Ford numbered wheels that they were not a type of wheel originally/factory installed!! The smarter (and somewhat embarrassed) front-end guy finally had to show him the computer image of the wheel on the Ford parts data base to convince him. What made this exchange even more ridiculous was that they had a 03 300A sitting on their used car lot not 100 feet from where we were standing and it had the same "aftermarket" wheels on it too.:shake:
ugh,.. what a dumbass! :argue:
spiders
12-04-2005, 11:40 AM
I was told the car was too much for a woman and I should look at some of their other models... needless to say the test drive was amusing. Seatbelts a must! and the sheepish attitude when I signed the papers had me grinning!
But must admit that they know me when I come through the door now! Oh, and the general manager paid me the 100 bucks for his lost bet. No, I didn't get a ticket or destroy the car in the first year, and yes, the TA sold off their lot in 3 days...
teamrope
12-04-2005, 04:57 PM
Rayjay, problem not limited to ricers joints buddy....got the same BS from a Ford dealership service mgr no less, in a south Chicago burb while on a road trip in the MM awhile back. Went in for a warranty covered wheel alignment (fronts were starting to show the dreaded MM inside edge wear) and was initially told NO because the "aftermarket" wheels I had placed on the car had caused the tire wear problem. Pointed out FoMoCo part #s on MM wheels to the "Mr Know-it-all" ass't service mgr guy and he still argued claiming that even though they might be Ford numbered wheels that they were not a type of wheel originally/factory installed!! The smarter (and somewhat embarrassed) front-end guy finally had to show him the computer image of the wheel on the Ford parts data base to convince him. What made this exchange even more ridiculous was that they had a 03 300A sitting on their used car lot not 100 feet from where we were standing and it had the same "aftermarket" wheels on it too.:shake:
I would have shown him the owners manual.
jgc61sr2002
12-04-2005, 07:12 PM
ugh,.. what a dumbass! :argue:
Typical of most dealers.:(
Mike M
12-04-2005, 07:39 PM
It made sense to me, I just assumed we all already knew it but now that its officially written down I think its a real good thing.
Haggis
12-06-2005, 06:57 AM
I will not call it a Marauder R
No Marauder R here, but I do have a MARAUDER S
Hotrauder
12-06-2005, 11:03 AM
I pledge to honor your opinion as your opinion and to lose little sleep over it. I expect you to do with YOUR Marauder as pleases you and not really care to much about what anyone else does with THIERS. I pledge to park proudly next to any and all Marauders and to give respect to their owners and their ideas. If fact I am looking good ideas for additional STUFF to do to my car now. I know what NOT to do because I know what I like. Any ideas of what to do? Dennis:beer:
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