Adoption is final...the rest of the story.

[2003 MIB]

This Friday at 10:00am I become a father. Coli and I started the step-parent adoption process for her 5yo son about 6 months ago. It is an incredibly tedious process in Texas. We had to get a lawyer, the court appoints the boy a lawyer (yes, he can't always wipe his own bottom but he has a lawyer), social worker does an investigation, they fingerprinted me AGAIN (the state now has five cards on me). The deadbeat dad who hasn't paid child support or made any contact with the boy in over 3 years still has the right to say no and request a hearing etc... Finding this loser wasn't easy either. The termination of parental rights here is a huge deal- convicted, incarcerated felons still have the right to say no. There were many hoops and delays but now it's over and I'm pretty jazzed about it. So jazzed, we're going to Disneyworld and Universal Studios next month.
The Marauder is really starting to seem more like a car and less like a mistress. It's a strange tranformation in me-watching the boy play basketball or tee-ball or shoot his BB gun now seems more fun than the cruise night or car club meetings. Yeah, I know:puke: but it's the truth folks. If I'm not traveling, I pick him up at day care and we hang out a few hours every day before he hits the rack. I feel very lucky to have this life- I never knew it was in the cards for a guy like me. So, don't worry- I'm around and I'm fine. Happy as clam and doing what needs to get done.:D

[LiLWrink]

Congrats! Just remember that Boys grow up, and the old black sedan might be valuable to another young man someday...

[2003 MIB]

Hmmmm, there's wisdom in those words, Shane!

[StevenJ]

Okay, becareful with adopted children. Especially since this one is already five. If he was adopted just after birth, it would be different. He will most likely have trouble accepting you as his new father at first. It will be hard, I have had a number of friends that were adopted and most of them had a hard time getting along with their parents. Much more so than children that grow up with their real parents. And all my friends were adopted by the time they were two or three. I'm sure you'll get through it, but it is not going to easy at all. Good luck, you're going to need it and congragulations!

[Dragcity]

Glad to hear you got to where you want to be. Enjoy whatever life throws at you. His aim may be a little off right now, but it will get better...

[2003 MIB]

Okay, becareful with adopted children. Especially since this one is already five. If he was adopted just after birth, it would be different. He will most likely have trouble accepting you as his new father at first. It will be hard, I have had a number of friends that were adopted and most of them had a hard time getting along with their parents. Much more so than children that grow up with their real parents. And all my friends were adopted by the time they were two or three. I'm sure you'll get through it, but it is not going to easy at all. Good luck, you're going to need it and congragulations!

I'll be very careful...I've already noticed kind of a shifty look in his eye...he eats paste too- I find that odd...

[MERCMAN]

I'll be very careful...I've already noticed kind of a shifty look in his eye...he eats paste too- I find that odd...

More like you than you care to admit,,,eh?

[2003 MIB]

More like you than you care to admit,,,eh?

He calls his Mama's car a "ricer". You tell me...:D

[MERCMAN]

Now there is a boy that knows his terminology,, an extra ride on space mountain for that mensa candidate

[mrjones]

Congrats, Dan. And if this is the same kid I saw at Chuck's in Grapevine last June, it doesn't look like there's a lot of adjustment left to do.. Looked like you both know your roles. Looks like he was REEAAALLL comfortable behind the wheel of the Marauder, too.

Have a good time at DisneyWorld!

[MM03MOK]

Dan - this is wonderful news and really warms my heart. I know he means so much to you. Congratulations and best wishes to you all!! Maybe he'll even share his paste!!

[2003 MIB]

Thanks Mary and Mike,
Yep Mike!- That's my boy.

[O's Fan Rich]

That deserves a HUGE ATTABOY!!!
Congrats, POP!

[Wires]

He calls his Mama's car a "ricer". You tell me...:D

Congratulations! Sounds as if you're raising him right!

[rayjay]

Thats great! I sincerely commend you for your decision. This country would not be so screwed up if there were more men like you. Congradulations Dad. :up:

[03MERCMARAUDER]

Congradulations Dad, spend as much time as possible and remeber to always listen to his side of the story before you pass judgement LOL. Im sure you will do just fine. Sounds like you are very passionate about you new son adn thats what makes a great father.

Joe

[Logan]

Congrats Dan... Stop teachin' the kid the wonder of glue eatin'... Probably thinks its kids snuff or somethin'! ;)

[jimlam56]

Good luck and congratulations, be the Dad he wouldn't have gotten otherwise...
Jim

[Petrograde]

..he eats paste too- I find that odd...

I used to eat paste,... I turned out ok,... right? :bat: :bat: :bat: :lobster: :chicken:

:P

anyway,.... Congrats Dan! That's what I call 'stepping up to the plate'! :up:

[carfixer]

Congrats Dan, it sounds like you are both very lucky to have each other. Your story really made my day.

[cruzer]

CONGRATULATIONS, DADwELCOME TO THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF FATHERHOOD. There is something very special about the words " I'd like for you to meet my son"--all you have to do is love him, spoil him,be a Dad he can always depend on when he needs you, listen closely before you start reading the riot act and, most important of all--earn his trust. Just remember the things you did and thought as a young man--and don't jump to the conclusion that he is doing the same;) I wish you and Coli all the joy and happiness that children can bring. Your family is the most important thing in the world--cherish it and protect it--in other words---ENJOY !!!!! Ginny and I wish you and yours a wonderful life like we have had---See you when you can find a moment--( breakfast at Le Peep next month ????) Maury

[rocknrod]

He calls his Mama's car a "ricer". You tell me...:D
Good little man!
:)

[teamrope]

Dan - this is wonderful news and really warms my heart. I know he means so much to you. Congratulations and best wishes to you all!! Maybe he'll even share his paste!!

Congrats Dan and Colli! and Mary, I though all kids ate paste... I did!

[DEFYANT]

Good news indeed. Congrats. Being a Dad is the best experiance ever.

[Rider90]

Congrats!! I don't know what fatherhood is like, but I'm sure you'll like it.

[Two Hawks]

Congradulations Dan! :2thumbs:

Look forward to seein' you and your family.

[Haggis]

Best to both you and your new son and give Coli our best. He is lucky to have a dad like you, now get him away from the paste and start him on 93 octane.

[Mike Poore]

Dan, your story and that of our son, John's is almost the same, word for word, right down to the age of the child. The adoption in Ohio is much the same as in Texas, with the department folks touring the home, and doing a very thorough investigation of the environment, even though the mother (John's wife) has custody of the child. As in your case, the child's father could care less, and there was no difficulty with his agreeing to the adoption, as it relieved him of financial, and in his twisted mind, moral, responsibility, after having been dragged into court countless times for his outrageous behavior.

Anyway, like you, we are overjoyed, in our case being the grandparents, to have an official grandson, and will be going out for the ceremony in March which happens to be the boy's 7th birthday. The child, is beaming at the goings on, as are his maternal grandparents, who observed that even at his young age, the boy has more sense than his father.

Your post reminded us to count out blessings, and we support and applaud you and Coli for giving the little fellow a proper start in life.

God bless you both.

[2003 MIB]

Much thanks for all the good wishes and advice, Folks!!!

[BUCKWHEAT]

Dan, bless you and Coli for the patience to go thru the process. It is worth all the aggravation..and the money. You are a special guy to sign up for that duty. Any idiot can donate sperm. It takes a real man to be a dad. Just remember, the real parents are the ones doing the work! That's you and Coli, man.

My two adopted babies are 35 & 34, & I still love 'em. It really is a lifetime commitment.

Congrats.

JB

[martyo]

Excellent news my friend.

[seans]

Congrats and you did the right thing if you really love the boy.

My brother in law didn't listen to family advice and never adopted his wife's two boys. He raised them for eight years without their real dad ever seeing them once or paying a dime in child support. My brother in law's wife died last year and she wasn't even buried when the family of the two boys biological father convinced him to sue for custody (Life insurance and social security payments from the mother's death). They won and now my brother in law isn't even allowed to visit with the two boys.

[2003 MIB]

Congrats and you did the right thing if you really love the boy.

My brother in law didn't listen to family advice and never adopted his wife's two boys. He raised them for eight years without their real dad ever seeing them once or paying a dime in child support. My brother in law's wife died last year and she wasn't even buried when the family of the two boys biological father convinced him to sue for custody (Life insurance and social security payments from the mother's death). They won and now my brother in law isn't even allowed to visit with the two boys.

:bows: BINGO! This is exactly what happened to a co-worker and really kicked me in the butt to pursue this option. The State of Texas would have defaulted custody to Deadbeat Dad if anything happened to Coli. I couldn't allow that to happen. In our daily lives, it doesn't change anything or my relationship with the boy- we're cool, always have been and always will be. This is a just in case measure...<EDIT>My wife is an excellent driver who often uses her blinkers and has been known to pay attention to surrounding traffic. :rolleyes:

[jgc61sr2002]

Dan - Congrats and best wishes.:D

[cyclone03]

Great news!

When I was at Chucks last year all I noticed was a man with HIS family.
To bad "law" has to interfear,it's plain to see you allready are the boys father.
In years to come Coli will come to respect you even more for the effort you put forth to complete his and his mothers life.


Good on you!!!

[2003 WIB]

Thanks so much to everyone for the best wishes. I would like to take this opportunity to say that Chase does not eat paste....yet. According to the teachers he doesn't stop talking long enough to eat paste. I would like to point out that no matter what my husband says I am an excellent driver and I love my ricer (RX-8). :) Thanks again everyone. Dan is an excellent Daddy.

[MM03MOK]

Hi Coli ! :wave: :hug2:

[teamrope]

Hi Coli! :) He'll eat paste soon enough.... Its a boy thing.

[Haggis]

Hi Coli! :) He'll eat paste soon enough.... Its a boy thing.
Forget the paste thing, get him on the 93 octane. Nothing like a good siphon of gas in the gut.

[2003 MIB]

Forget the paste thing, get him on the 93 octane. Nothing like a good siphon of gas in the gut.

Mmmm, tastes like chicken.:beer:

[Brutus]

Congrats Dan and Coli !! Thats great news. Maybe time for a re-fill??

[2003 MIB]

Congrats Dan and Coli !! Thats great news. Maybe time for a re-fill??

Oh no Brother!- There are already plenty of kids running around the house. Coli only turns 39 today and is as vibrant and fertile as ever. However, I am 40 and looking forward to enjoying my golden years. If all goes according to plan, the last one will be out of the house in 13 years... Whew!:rolleyes:

[Mike Poore]

according to plan, the last one will be out of the house in 13 years... Whew!:rolleyes:

Don't count on it ....sometimes, .......they come back. (and bring their ***** with them)

When John left the first time I made sure the speakers were the first thing on the truck, when he came back, they were the first thing he unloaded.:shake:

Once John moved out the second time, we moved also ....and left no forwarding address. :D

Erma Bombeck wrote a delightful piece about her son's moving out .....no more two hour showers" she said, ......then he came back ......:rofl:

[SergntMac]

Congrats Dan and Coli, best wishes for smooth sailing ahead.

Oh, and remember it's Elmer's...The original blend.

[Ross]

Congratulations, Dan. Of all of the many unpleasant things I have done as a lawyer, two adoptions I did many years ago still stand out as being the most enjoyable. Glad to see that you're letting him shoot the BB gun, too. After all, he IS a Texan!

[2003 WIB]

:banana: :banana: :banana:

[MM03MOK]

Coli.....bigger picture, please....too small to see.....

:bunny:

[Fastronald]

As a Father of three kids........gotta tell ya good for you man! You make us proud. Funny how a child can make the simple things seem so large and happy. Some of the best times of my life were with my kids growing up. They are 24, 22 and 18 now.

Good job Dad!

[2003 MIB]

Posting this for Mike.

I saw this yesterday- It made my week!!

[Ross]

That's about as good as it gets!

[martyo]

Dan: I am still available for adoption if you want. :D

[2003 MIB]

Dan: I am still available for adoption if you want. :D

You're just looking for an easier drug supply.:D