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dwasson
06-16-2006, 07:09 PM
From: http://www.carkeys.co.uk/features/everything_else/9529.asp

Feng Shui For Cars


by David Finlay (12 April 2006)

It might be a good idea to cast off your sense of irony before you start reading this (but remember where you put it because it may come in handy later). What we have here is a report commissioned by specialist insurance broker Aon Private Clients which is itself part of Aon Corporation, a worldwide provider of risk management services, management consulting and specialty insurance underwriting, among other things. All very straightforward and businesslike so far, but the report is based on the Eastern philosophy of feng shui, and is in fact claimed to be the first study relating feng shui to cars.


If you're not into this sort of thing you might raise an eyebrow on learning that the study was conducted for Aon by an estate agent called Raymond Catchpole. Well, more fool you, then, because Catchpole stopped being an estate agent some time ago and is now a full-time feng shui consultant, and Chairman of the Feng Shui Society. He has taken four different types of vehicle and rated them in order of their feng shuiness. Here they are, in order, with a summary of the findings.

Lexus RX Series: An extremely purposeful vehicle. Its chi energy gives it the "wow" factor. Powered by the Fire element, the Lexus promises to go anywhere and through anything to deliver its driver safe an unruffled. The car is both family- and business-orientated and has the best possible quality of feng shiu to achieve this.

Volkswagen Passat: Quiet, restrained and in a state of perfect yin/yang balance. Ideal for non-sales related decisive managers who place great importance on family and friends.

Nissan Micra: A fun and possibly a little cheeky car in the right/wrong hands. A very yin motor. Ideally suited to a first-time female driver who wants an incident-free journey and an arrival that may well raise a few smiles.

Porsche Boxster: A feminine and unemotional car which uses the natural element of Water to help chi energy flow. An unaggressive vehicle, an ideal drive for a happy and single architect.

But what if none of these cars is suitable for your lifestyle, religious beliefs or star sign? Fortunately, the report adds that the feng shui of any car can be improved, and here are a few of them. First, it's advisable to keep the car as tidy as possible, since excess clutter "sucks the life force out of the driver". Bluetooth and other wi-fi connections have a similar effect, so if they're fitted the driver and passengers should drink regular quantities of still water.

Negative energy inside the car can be countered by singing, clapping your hands or playing music "to make a statement that it is now your cleared space and will go forward refreshed and free from past events" (but be careful about playing music through a Bluetooth connection, obviously).

The car's windows should be kept clean at all times, not just so that you can see through them but also because, in feng shui terms, "the windows are the eyes for the car".

Drivers are also advised to tie a small blue ribbon to the rear view mirror, or alternatively to the satellite navigation system. Blue, you see, is a representation of the Water element, which is "the perfect driving state of mind: clear, thoughtful, flowing and clear". Another way of achieving the same effect is to keep a bottle of water in the car.

Better still, sprinkle sea salt crystals on the carpets. These absorb the passengers' negative energy (if there's any left after all that singing and clapping), and although they don't actually take that energy out of the car you can do that yourself by cleaning up the crystals and throwing them away.

Oh, and be sure to park your car so that it faces away from the house. Cars are "predatory tigers" and they create a threat to the occupants of any building they point towards.

I need my sense of irony back now, so I'll have to stop. But I'll leave you with these thoughts from Ian Cullen, a Director of Aon Private Clients: "It may seem unusual for a specialist insurance broker to be interested in something like feng shui, but we believe it’s worth investigating.

"Feng shui is about the way in which our environment affects our behaviour and our mood - be it a building or a car. If some of the information in our report helps drivers keep calm and alert, then we feel it’s a useful exercise. With road rage on the increase and our cities and motorways becoming ever more congested, maintaining a balanced state of mind becomes all the more difficult."

duhtroll
06-16-2006, 08:58 PM
The sad part is that someone paid for this.

Feng Shui = crap. Kinda like all that so-called psychic phenomena.