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CBT
07-27-2007, 05:20 PM
Laid-Off Ford Employee Decides To Start Own Car Company<FORM id=email_this onsubmit="email_submit_ticket();return false;" action="">

<SCRIPT language=JavaScript1.1 src="http://ad.doubleclick.net/adj/N2998.Onion/B2397174.12;sz=60x30;ord=64895 4250?"></SCRIPT><NOSCRIPT></NOSCRIPT></FORM>HAPEVILLE, GA—Calling his recent layoff "just the kind of a kick in the pants" he needed, former Ford Motor Company autoworker Chris Thaney announced the creation of the Thaney Motor Company Monday.
Enlarge Image http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Laid-Off-R.article.jpg (javascript:void(0);) Thaney at Thaney Motor Company



"Losing my job was the best thing that could have ever happened to me," said the 34-year-old Thaney, who made $57,000 on the production line as a door fitter until the Hapeville plant closed down last month. "I know cars. I've been around cars for nearly a decade now. I don't need to work for a big, corporate auto manufacturer to do what I love."

Headquartered in Thaney's home garage and financed mainly through his unemployment compensation and United Auto Workers layoff benefits, the new company's credo is, according to Thaney, to "design affordable, versatile and easy-handling cars for ordinary Americans." Saying that his time at Ford taught him "what not to do," Thaney explained that his car company will not be the victim of overproduction and other inefficient practices that have resulted in intensifying competition and declining profits.
"Today's consumers want something made with precision and care," Thaney said. "Not something that was spit out in 58 seconds by a thousand people and some machines."
Enlarge Image http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Laid-Off-Jump-R.article.jpg (javascript:void(0);) Preliminary designs for Thaney Motor Company's first model, the Centaur.



Thaney said his cars will be a hit with the public because he will "spare no expense," while still managing to avoid stifling bureaucracy, overpaid executives, and cost overruns.
"As long as I'm in charge, that's the Thaney Motor Company pledge," he added.
"At Ford it was all about the bottom line," said Thaney. "With me, the customer will always come first. Well, after the cars."

"Where Ford went wrong was not going on the Internet to find engines and other parts," Thaney said. "They could have joined one of those online car clubs and swapped stuff for practically nothing, without compromising on quality. "

Already, Thaney is hard at work building his first model, the Thaney Centaur, a four-door station wagon based on his wife's 1999 Ford Taurus four-door station-wagon, whose platform he considers "an American classic in need of some minor retooling." He also has plans to create models patterned closely after the Ford Focus engine, the Dodge Neon chassis, and a friend's 1990 Pontiac Grand Prix paint job. In a nod to his old assembly-line position, the models will boast well-fitted doors and multiple side-mounted mirrors.

"I'm still trying to figure out how to install airbags, CD changers, GPS systems, steering wheels, and trunks," Thaney said. "But once I learn these things, I'll craft them with precision and care, not like some of the stuff you see coming out of Detroit."

Thaney plans to roll out the first Thaney Centaur by February, but hopes to step up production considerably by the end of 2007.

ChiTownMaraud3r
07-27-2007, 05:25 PM
What a shame...

Which brings me to our next topic kids, don't do crack...::nono:

Bluerauder
07-27-2007, 05:38 PM
Didn't a guy named Tucker try this more than 50 years ago and get squashed by the big boys? Sure would like to have a Tucker today. :D

CBT
12-26-2008, 04:26 PM
Wow! Looks like this old thread may become a reality!

finster101
12-26-2008, 04:29 PM
High hopes for a guy that doesn't know which end of cap goes forward!

O's Fan Rich
12-26-2008, 05:06 PM
I hear he's looking for a 7.5 billion dollar bailout now.....