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View Full Version : Farm kid joins the Army... first letter home.



W4LTD
02-28-2010, 06:39 PM
Dear Ma and Pa,


I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Army beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m. But I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee. Their food, plus yours, holds you until noon when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

We go on 'route marches,' which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A 'route march' is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home.. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake . I only beat him once.. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6' and 130 pounds and he's 6'8' and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.


Your loving daughter,

Alice.

Phrog_gunner
02-28-2010, 06:46 PM
I wonder if this is the guy Alice was wrastlin???

Ladyhawke
02-28-2010, 07:02 PM
:beer:

....

MMBLUE
02-28-2010, 07:13 PM
That story cracks me up. As a former Drill SGT I can kinda relate with that story. I used to like to get them country boys. Ladies and gentlemen thats the great Soldiers we have in the services, over in fly-over country.
Well maybe not that guy in the picture above. He has a eating profile:agree:

69428SCJ
02-28-2010, 08:19 PM
Clearly AR 600-9 doesn't apply to that Soldier...

CBT
02-28-2010, 09:00 PM
Holy crap, that dudes an Army of Two.


I wonder if this is the guy Alice was wrastlin???

http://www.armytoolbag.com/Tools/Videos/MilHumor/ArmyStrong.jpg

Mr. Man
02-28-2010, 09:00 PM
Clearly AR 600-9 doesn't apply to that Soldier...

For those of us not acquainted with an AR 600-9 please enlighten us:dunno:

-Matt-
02-28-2010, 09:21 PM
For those of us not acquainted with an AR 600-9 please enlighten us:dunno:



AR 600-9 (Army Regulation 600-9) is the Armys weight control program

http://www.army.mil/USAPA/epubs/pdf/r600_9.pdf

69428SCJ
02-28-2010, 09:22 PM
Army Regulation 600-9 is "The Army Weight Control Program". Basically it lays out the height and weight standards for your age and height. It instructs how to measure the Soldier's BMI (which is a very innacurate method) and provides for disciplinary measures for not meeting them. Basically someone like him should've never been allowed to get that large. If he had a commander that really didn't like "fat bodies" he could be discharged...

Mr. Man
03-01-2010, 12:22 AM
So what's wrong with that guy? He's just a wee little bloke. Bet he barely tips the scales at 300lbs. You've got to remember the camera adds 10lbs.:lol:

W4LTD
03-01-2010, 02:52 AM
Wow, if there ever was a great example of a Hijacked Thread, this is it!

:eek: :Offtopic: :shake: :hijack: :rolleyes:

(Phrog: you need to start your own f:censor:ing thread!)

Phrog_gunner
03-01-2010, 04:58 AM
I didn't mean to, bro. :( I'd go back and delete the pic but someone already quoted it so it wouldn't disappear.

CBT
03-01-2010, 05:23 AM
I didn't mean to, bro. :( I'd go back and delete the pic but someone already quoted it so it wouldn't disappear.
What the hell were you thinking, posting something funny in a funny post?

Haggis
03-01-2010, 05:34 AM
Wow, if there ever was a great example of a Hijacked Thread, this is it!

:eek: :Offtopic: :shake: :hijack: :rolleyes:

(Phrog: you need to start your own f:censor:ing thread!)

Someone did not have their coffee yet this morning.

Mr. Man
03-01-2010, 10:53 AM
It's still somewhat militarily related