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View Full Version : Rear cooling mod ideas.



CBT
04-01-2010, 08:06 AM
Well since a member here decided to take a big ol' Hondo in the middle of lubing his rear end and forgot to re-fill it, I have come up with a solution.
Lets face it, modifications to the Mercury Marauders are few and far between. As a matter of fact, they are rarer than rocking horse turds, and the ones people DO come up with suck:
Blowers?
Better brakes?
Beefier driveshaft?
Biotch please!!
Now a few minutes ago, while I myself was sitting on the porcelain throne deploying a few Marines, it hit me: A rear (differential) cooling mod! There is already a threaded hole in the cover, so you don't need to drill and tap it. But, you will need to drill and tap your oil filter, we'll get to that later. So check it out, underneath the Marauder is a long, straight, fairly sturdy round looking thingy that runs from the front part of the car TO THE DIFFERENTIAL!! I'm thinking weld a couple pipe hangers/brackets to the side (pick a side) of the long round thing. Then, you can run your piping along this, snake it around to where the filler plug is on the differential, and screw that bad boy in there with something that screws stuff together. Now back to tapping the oil filter. You will need to tap the oil filter. Cause, stay with me, THIS is where you will get the oil to cool the differential!! Genious!
Wait a sec, I just thought of something. That won't work, you'd have to add more oil. At least the amount equal to whatever roughly 6 feet of 3/4 inch PVC piping and associated elbows will hold.
Disco! I've got it! Screw that damn oil filter mod, you'd have to take it off to tap it, and those things are as hard to get off as an Amish gals home made skirt anyway, which is why I've never changed my oil.
Now think people, what is the largest fluid resevoir in your Marauder (Excluding yourself, perv.)? The GAS TANK!! And it's damn near on top of the differential anyway! I mean, out of all the fluids in your car, which one is always, ALWAYS cool to the touch? Excluding Blue Moons. GAS! It has a great cooling effect, ever spilled some on your hands? Your hands felt cooler, didn't they. Damn right they did. That's due to what scientisty type people refer to as PFM (Pure ****ing Magic). Plus, you wouldn't even need a return line, gasoline has an incredible "creep rate", it will just recycle itself thru capuhlarry traction.
Sheeeeeeyaaaaaaa!
And gas is a great cleaner, so it will keep your hiney shiney. Well, internally at least.
I'm thinking I will put this kit together and offer a group buy, with a final price of, oh, over 9000?

Haggis
04-01-2010, 08:11 AM
Your crazy. CBT = Crazy BUT Terminal

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 08:11 AM
Well since a member here decided to take a big ol' Hondo in the middle of lubing his rear end and forgot to re-fill it, I have come up with a solution.
Lets face it, modifications to the Mercury Marauders are few and far between. As a matter of fact, they are rarer than rocking horse turds, and the ones people DO come up with suck:
Blowers?
Better brakes?
Beefier driveshaft?
Biotch please!!
Now a few minutes ago, while I myself was sitting on the porcelain throne deploying a few Marines, it hit me: A rear (differential) cooling mod! There is already a threaded hole in the cover, so you don't need to drill and tap it. But, you will need to drill and tap your oil filter, we'll get to that later. So check it out, underneath the Marauder is a long, straight, fairly sturdy round looking thingy that runs from the front part of the car TO THE DIFFERENTIAL!! I'm thinking weld a couple pipe hangers/brackets to the side (pick a side) of the long round thing. Then, you can run your piping along this, snake it around to where the filler plug is on the differential, and screw that bad boy in there with something that screws stuff together. Now back to tapping the oil filter. You will need to tap the oil filter. Cause, stay with me, THIS is where you will get the oil to cool the differential!! Genious!
Wait a sec, I just thought of something. That won't work, you'd have to add more oil. At least the amount equal to whatever roughly 6 feet of 3/4 inch PVC piping and associated elbows will hold.
Disco! I've got it! Screw that damn oil filter mod, you'd have to take it off to tap it, and those things are as hard to get off as an Amish gals home made skirt anyway, which is why I've never changed my oil.
Now think people, what is the largest fluid resevoir in your Marauder (Excluding yourself, perv.)? The GAS TANK!! And it's damn near on top of the differential anyway! I mean, out of all the fluids in your car, which one is always, ALWAYS cool to the touch? Excluding Blue Moons. GAS! It has a great cooling effect, ever spilled some on your hands? Your hands felt cooler, didn't they. Damn right they did. That's due to what scientisty type people refer to as PFM (Pure ****ing Magic). Plus, you wouldn't even need a return line, gasoline has an incredible "creep rate", it will just recycle itself thru capuhlarry traction.
Sheeeeeeyaaaaaaa!
And gas is a great cleaner, so it will keep your hiney shiney. Well, internally at least.
I'm thinking I will put this kit together and offer a group buy, with a final price of, oh, over 9000?

I think you have been hanging out with Dom too much.

CBT
04-01-2010, 08:12 AM
I think you have been hanging out with Dom too much.
I'm trying to help, don't hate just because you din't think of it and I'm going to get riaaaaaach!! off this idea.

Zack
04-01-2010, 08:12 AM
Will it come in 17 boxes over a 3 month time period?

Sign me up if so.

Zack
04-01-2010, 08:13 AM
I think you have been hanging out with Dom too much.

You did not have to press the quote button. :argue: :D

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 08:14 AM
STOLEN! You stole this idea from ArenJay!!!!

CBT
04-01-2010, 08:15 AM
Will it come in 17 boxes over a 3 month time period?

Sign me up if so.

Hellz yes. And each box will contain a Hoff pic.

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 08:15 AM
I'm trying to help, don't hate just because you din't think of it and I'm going to get riaaaaaach!! off this idea.

Big pimpin spendin cheese, big pimpin on BLAPs

Haggis
04-01-2010, 08:16 AM
STOLEN! You stole this idea from ArenJay!!!!

They were/are best friends you know.

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 08:17 AM
They won't once he finds out that Casey is stealing his idea and charging triple what ArenJay was planning on charging to do it for everyone!!

They were/are best friends you know.

CBT
04-01-2010, 08:25 AM
They won't once he finds out that Casey is stealing his idea and charging triple what ArenJay was planning on charging to do it for everyone!!
There's no way he thought of this idea first. And if this doesn't pan out, I will market my centrifigal blower/posi traction idea. Blowers force things to turn faster by ramming air into them hard and fast. Why put it on the motor, when the rear end is the part doing the actual turning? I'm going to mount a centri to the rear differential and go Duke Nukem on them splines!
this kit will alos retail for over 9000.
Preach!

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 08:28 AM
You should only accept Yen for payment, that way you can go get your special massage and not have to pay for currency exchange.

CBT
04-01-2010, 08:33 AM
You should only accept Yen for payment, that way you can go get your special massage and not have to pay for currency exchange.

Yen? Is she hot?

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 08:37 AM
Yen? Is she hot?

Hot enough to bathe and massage you long time. I have to pay extra, I'm too beaucoup.

CBT
04-01-2010, 08:38 AM
Hot enough to bathe and massage you long time. I have to pay extra, I'm too beaucoup.
I see. You got the Alabama black snake mod?

justbob
04-01-2010, 08:38 AM
http://i300.photobucket.com/albums/nn19/marauding4life/lame-1-1.jpg

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 08:43 AM
I see. You got the Alabama black snake mod?

Nope its the white snake version.

http://thanmoreseries.files.wordpress .com/2008/07/whitesnake-lovehunter-1979.jpg
(http://thanmoreseries.files.wordpress .com/2008/07/whitesnake-lovehunter-1979.jpg)

Joe Walsh
04-01-2010, 09:23 AM
STOLEN! You stole this idea from ArenJay!!!!

AJ's required longer piping because it was an 'L' edition.


They were/are best friends you know.

I've always suspected this...now it's confirmed!...:shake:


There's no way he thought of this idea first. And if this doesn't pan out, I will market my centrifigal blower/posi traction idea. Blowers force things to turn faster by ramming air into them hard and fast. Why put it on the motor, when the rear end is the part doing the actual turning? I'm going to mount a centri to the rear differential and go Duke Nukem on them splines!
this kit will alos retail for over 9000.
Preach!

Based on your two modding ideas, It seems like you already have the "gas fume recirculation" mod installed in your Marauder!


Nope its the white snake version.

http://thanmoreseries.files.wordpress .com/2008/07/whitesnake-lovehunter-1979.jpg
(http://thanmoreseries.files.wordpress .com/2008/07/whitesnake-lovehunter-1979.jpg)

Smaller, yet still effective!

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 09:25 AM
It's not the size of the snake, but how good of a grasp you have on it...

Smaller, yet still effective!

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 09:27 AM
It's not the size of the snake, but how good of a grasp you have on it...

That's NOT what she said!

Joe Walsh
04-01-2010, 09:27 AM
It's not the size of the snake, but how good of a grasp you have on it...

That's the difference between pink and purple!

Joe Walsh
04-01-2010, 09:29 AM
Based on the title of the thread, I thought that you would start describing how nice it felt to rub a little Prep 'H' on the "brown bullseye."

IBTL!

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 09:36 AM
Based on the title of the thread, I thought that you would start describing how nice it felt to rub a little Prep 'H' on the "brown bullseye."

IBTL!

Why can't you get one of Dom's threads locked? This one is at least amusing.

Joe Walsh
04-01-2010, 09:47 AM
Why can't you get one of Dom's threads locked? This one is at least amusing.

I've tried...I know that just about everyone of mine has been closed/locked.

It seems that only the entertaining, funny, or slightly controversial threads get locked!

massacre
04-01-2010, 10:01 AM
LMAO @ this thread

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 10:43 AM
In before the brown eye slams shut!

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 10:50 AM
In before the brown eye slams shut!

A big brown eye on your grill would look better than fog lights.

CBT
04-01-2010, 10:56 AM
I've posted an informative and innovative thread for once and you jokers are making fun of me.

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 10:59 AM
I've posted an informative and innovative thread for once and you jokers are making fun of me.

http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/9/11/128656545487104175.jpg


It is a much better idea than fog lights in the grill.

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 10:59 AM
Welcome to my world!

The grill of my car slamming your brown eye turning you into a hood ornament would be great!

I've posted an informative and innovative thread for once and you jokers are making fun of me.

CBT
04-01-2010, 11:02 AM
Welcome to my world!

The grill of my car slamming your brown eye turning you into a hood ornament would be great!
Yes but my rear diff. cooling mod or rear diff. centri mod will increase the resale value of the car by, mmmm, over 9000. I like your grill mod idea, but which mod will generate more positive feedback at a car show? MINE.

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 11:14 AM
Nobody cares about your rear end mod except Phrogg... He is all about tapping a hole in your rear end!

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 11:17 AM
Nobody cares about your rear end mod except Phrogg... He is all about tapping a hole in your rear end!

You must not have read his first post completely, it has already been tapped. :beer:

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 11:20 AM
Let me at it and I will bore it out a little and tap it!

You must not have read his first post completely, it has already been tapped. :beer:

CBT
04-01-2010, 11:21 AM
Let me at it and I will bore it out a little and tap it!
It's an 8 3/4 inch rear end. Go bigger or stay home.

Joe Walsh
04-01-2010, 11:40 AM
It's an 8 3/4 inch rear end. Go bigger or stay home.

:hmmm:
That explains why the Ford 9" has been so popular for so many rears....errr.....years!

IBTL!

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 11:46 AM
My tap is metric only... sorry:alone:

It's an 8 3/4 inch rear end. Go bigger or stay home.

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 12:05 PM
My tap is metric only... sorry:alone:

Translation: smaller and not as strong as AMERICAN!

Big Black Beast
04-01-2010, 12:23 PM
A big brown eye on your grill would look better than fog lights.

Or how about a single 8" exhaust pipe in the center of the rear bumper?:rolleyes:

-Matt-
04-01-2010, 12:29 PM
http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc173/FrankLongo/lavar.gif

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 12:32 PM
Or how about a single 8" exhaust pipe in the center of the rear bumper?:rolleyes:


http://tomopop.com/ul/5223-do_want.jpg

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 12:34 PM
It may be metric, but it isn't made in China! Comes with a lifetime warranty...

Translation: smaller and not as strong as AMERICAN!

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 12:39 PM
http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc173/FrankLongo/lavar.gif

If you had locked down your rear like you are trying to lock down this thread, you might have avoided passing that herpes test with a C.

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 12:39 PM
it may be metric, but it isn't made in china! Comes with a lifetime warranty...


racist!!!!

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 01:21 PM
White man with a brown man's package
http://www.collegeboxes.com/cb-com/layout/Images/partners/ups-logo.jpg

racist!!!!

CBT
04-01-2010, 01:24 PM
So who is going to order my kit? I'm only going to make 50, then never ever never make anymore, until about 3 years from now.

Phrog_gunner
04-01-2010, 01:26 PM
So who is going to order my kit? I'm only going to make 50, then never ever never make anymore, until about 3 years from now.

I would need to fully inspect your rear before I could commit.

Egon Spengler
04-01-2010, 01:40 PM
I am going to need a full diagram of your rear... I never commit until I get a good wiff of what I am getting myself into... I like to feel things out and probe around before I commit

TooManyFords
04-01-2010, 01:41 PM
http://asset.soup.io/asset/0754/5221_4c47.gif

Egon Spengler
04-02-2010, 05:40 AM
TMF... I am speechless hahaha